Here’s the good news – Kareena Kapoor does indeed wear a bikini in Tashan. But the bad news is that you might just miss the shot because there are good chances you’ll fall asleep during this film.
If you haven’t yet got what we’re trying to say, allow us to S-P-E-L-L it out. Tashan is a movie that makes you cringe in your seat.
The story
Bhaiyyaji (Anil Kapoor) is a don who wants to make it big on the international arena. So he hires a call centre executive-cum-English teacher Jimmy Cliff (Saif Ali Khan) to teach him Queen’s English.
Also working for Bhaiyyaji is the beautiful Pooja (Kareena Kapoor), a typical Indian girl who woos Jimmy with her simplicity.
Pooja tells Jimmy that the reason she’s working with Bhaiiyaji is because her father owed him a lot of money and the only way she can get out of her misery is by marrying him.
So the two hatch a plan, steal Bhaiiyaji’s Rs 25 crore and elope. But Pooja double crosses Jimmy and leaves him in the lurch.
Enter Bachchan Pandey (Akshay Kumar) a local goon who takes Jimmy to Haridwar and the two manage to find Pooja. Here we learn that the seemingly straightforward Pooja is in fact quite hot and sexy. And she makes Bachchan weak in his knees. Jimmy and Pooja use this to the hilt as the latter seduces him.
In a state of drunkenness, Bachchan tells Pooja of his long lost childhood love. Gudiya. Pooja claims that she is the very girl he had fallen for and has him wrapped around her little finger.
But Bhaiiyaji not only wants his money, but also wants Pooja and Jimmy dead. Bachchan is now caught in a quandry, because he is about to lose the woman he loves… all over again.
This is Kareena’s first movie after Jab We Met. Her look and role in Tashan is diametrically opposite to that in Jab We Met. For one, she was actually dressed up in the latter. For whatever it is worth, Bebo delivers whatever little she has to.
Bebo-Saif chemistry
If you’re hoping to see some sizzling moments between Bollywood’s hottest couple, chances are that you will be disappointed. Yes, there’s a romantic track between Kareena and Akshay and that’s barely anything to talk about.
Er… some Khiladi-Anari action perhaps?
Most sorely missed in Tashan is the chemistry between Akshay and Saif. The two rocked in Main Khiladi Tu Anari. And no other film has managed to recreate that magic.
We were hoping to see some male bonding between the two in Tashan. But the two barely have any scenes together. That’s disappointing considering it may just have been the one thing that could have salvaged the film.
Akshay Kumar
Yet again the greying Kumar has proved why he gets paid as much as he does. Bebo-Saif may be glam factor in Tashan. But Akshay is the one who actually makes this film worth watching, if at all. Tashan belongs solely to him.
Also, we aren’t sure if we noticed Akki’s smile before or whether he got his pearly whites sparkling especially for this film. But we won’t be surprised if he becomes a brand ambassador for a toothpaste.
Tashan is a spoof… or is it?
That’s the question most of us kept asking after we walked out of the cinema hall. It is quite evident that the film was drawing upon a lot of Hindi movies.
There are some really funny moments too – like the part, which is very evidently a take-off on Don. The ACP tells Saif that he’s the only one in the police department who knows Saif is on their side… and gets killed in the very next frame.
But somehow, unlike Om Shanti Om, Tashan fails to strike the chord and instead goes off on a tangent. For instance, the film follows the ‘pharmoola’ of a con girl taking a guy for a ride and falling for him and then by introducing the childhood sweetheart track, falls for the very thing its spoofing.
The action
Tashan was supposed to have some groundbreaking action sequences. But the only thing that you are left breaking is your head. The two major fight sequences are choreographed such, they make Bhagwan Dada’s fighting seem modern.
Also, the action sequences almost seem deliberately inserted. In the climax scene, some half dozen Chinese men come to fight Akshay out of the blue, making you wonder if Akki actually paid them to show off his martial arts skills.
The look
It seemed from the promos that Tashan was all about style. And perhaps that’s the only thing the film will be remembered for. But that was the very thing with Jhoom Barabar Jhoom too. So if after watching the movie the only thing someone thought worthwhile taking about were the wigs, we’d assume it wouldn’t be a compliment.
Verdict
There are far better English movies running in the theatres. Go watch them instead. The brilliant Anil Kapoor seems completely wasted in this one. And somehow we can’t believe that Yash Raj is actually bargaining with the multiplexes for this movie. Surely, we’ve seen a lot better movies from the banner.
Rating:2/5
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